Friday, May 23, 2014

My Big Bookish Regret

Dear readers, I have a confession to make. You see, I've been looking back on my reading history and feeling like my shelves are missing some of my old friends. I keep asking myself why on earth I ever got rid of them, but that's a rhetorical question because I know damn well what the answer is. You see, as a kid and a teenager, I loved getting rid of books. Don't worry, I never threw a book in the trash, but I was big on "growing out of" books and rounding up big piles to take to the used bookstores so I could replace them with newer books, non-school-related books, more "grown-up" books or whatever else was striking my fancy at the time. Granted, it would have made our multiple moves over the years even more difficult, but I look back and am so sad I don't have any of my Nancy Drew or Babysitter's Club books. I don't have any of the Mary Higgins Clarks I inhaled during my first "adult" mystery phase. I can count on one hand the number of books from my school days I have the same physical copy of:


Fahrenheit 451, by Ray Bradbury -- I thought this one was gone as well until I found it recently at my parents' house. Lucky for me we held onto it for my brother who didn't mind in the slightest if added it back to my collection.


Wait Till Helen Comes, by Mary Downing Hahn -- This wasn't a school book, but I read it SO many times. I also read every other Mary Downing Hahn book my hometown library had in circulation. I can't even really remember what they were about anymore, but I absolutely loved them back then.


Mrs. Frisby & the Rats of Nimh, by Robert C. O'Brien -- a grammar school summer reading assignment that I enjoyed and miraculously held onto for all these years. Why this one and not others is a bit of a mystery to me!

And that's it. Those are the only ones that have survived to adulthood. There is a box of (mostly) picture books at my parents' house that my mom kept, but so many of the ones I remember most fondly now, I passed on with barely a second thought. I'm not upset I got rid of the ones I didn't like the first time around, but I actually liked reading Romeo & Juliet and A Midsummer Night's Dream. I liked Cold Sassy Tree so much I actually sought out the (unfinished) sequel. They may not have all been absolute favorites, but I distinctly remember liking The House on Mango Street, The Giver, Number the Stars, To Kill a Mockingbird, The Last Unicorn, The Poisonwood Bible, Catcher in the Rye, The Importance of Being Earnest, Anne Frank: The Diary of a Young Girl, A Christmas Carol, and The Crystal Cave -- all of which were either part of the curriculum or summer reading options. Strange & Unexpected Love was an incredible memoir written by a Holocaust survivor who came to speak at my high school -- why on earth did I not keep that book?!?!

So this, my friends, is my Big Bookish Regret. This adult bookworm really wishes she had held onto more of her childhood and teenage books. 14-year-old me couldn't possibly imagine the nostalgia 28-year-old me would be feeling all these years later. I've replaced a few over the years, but in my excitement over my new Required Re-Reading Project, I've been doing it a lot more lately. Starting fresh with new, shiny copies of books I didn't like when I read them for school is one thing, but I do wish I had my original copies of some books I did like. There's not much to be done about it now, unfortunately. I think I've found a bit of a loophole in my Golden Rule of Book Buying, but I really don't feel too guilty about it :)

What about you? Do you ever regret getting rid of books? Or have other bookish regrets? I'd love to know!

28 comments:

  1. I do sometimes feel a pang of nostalgic regret... but thankfully those pangs are few and far between. I'm far too practical about possessions to hold on to stuff like that. If I didn't get rid of my old books when I did, there are a hundred other times between then and now that it would have happened.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I seem to be practical about all possessions...except books!

      Delete
  2. I have a pile of about 3 books right now I'm going to go sell to the bookstore. I still have most of my books from my childhood, but then again we never were a book buying family although if you saw our computer room you would disagree. My dad loves to buy books and never read them. We always borrowed from the library so I have very few childhood books. I'm glad I kept my Judy Blume Fudge books because I will be reading those to my kids in the future.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's so great you still have most of your childhood books! I'm sure some of the books I *think* I got rid of may have been library books or provided by the school district...but my hazy memory has me placing all the blame on myself! Either way, I got rid of plenty :(

      Delete
  3. The books I really miss are the ones from my early childhood. My parents gave them away when I was in college.

    Many of my teenage books are still in boxes, either in my basement or at a storage facility. I really have no excuse for leaving them there except that it just seems easier to go on missing them than it would be to find them, sort through them, and find room on my bookshelves. There's no such thing as too many books, but there is such a thing as too little space for them.

    I'm mostly an e-book reader now, and I've purchased electronic copies of most of my old favorites. To Kill a Mockingbird is one of my absolute favorite books. I have a copy in storage, a copy on my bookshelves at home, and a pre-ordered copy that will download to my Kindle in a few months (there's a lot of speculation as to why Harper Lee's classic wasn't available as an e-book). I try not to spend too much money on books I already own, but there are some books that are worth buying over and over again.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. "There's no such thing as too many books, but there is such a thing as too little space for them." <-- YES!! That would be such a fun project to go through those boxes and see what you still have, I think. Think of all the hidden treasures that might be right under your nose :)

      Delete
  4. I so agree, I want some of the old series I used to love and now i cannot even remember the names!
    Missie @ A Flurry of Ponderings

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It would be nice to have at least a few, right? I do forget a bit how prolific some of them were -- realistically, they probably would have overrun my whole house by now if I still had them!

      Delete
  5. My childhood books are my babies. I don't think any have been thrown away, my parents didn't really care what took place on my bookshelves. Most of them are still in mum's house, but I've been bringing them here few at a time (and re-reading at the same time). They are so important for me for some reason! And I'm the kind of person that generally does not keep any old items just for the sake of them - I like to throw away stuff very regularly, and it makes me feel good, just no childhood books.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's so wonderful! I really do want to look through that box of picture books at my parents' house the next time I visit -- who knows what might be hiding there?! I love throwing stuff out, too -- but wish I wasn't so eager to pass on books in the past. Every book I consider giving away now I weigh very carefully!

      Delete
  6. My mum told me as a child that 'you can never have too many books', so I didn't get rid of any as far as I remember. I think that statement is her own bookish regret ;) I have grown out of believing it, but it took a while. It's good that it helped when you've moved - hold on to that thought :)

    The one that stands out for me is not noting down the exact name of a wonderful history book a teacher showed us at school. If a similar one catches my eye I'll take a look, but I doubt I'll ever find it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I like that slogan! I don't think I would ever want to hold on to every single book that passes through my house, but do think I was overly hasty with the childhood collection :(

      Not remembering the name of a book like that would drive me crazy! I'd keep thinking I could get my hands on it, if only I could remember the title.

      Delete
  7. Aside from the favourite YA books I talked about in my post, I actually own very few books I read when I was younger. Or even up to uni age. Mostly I passed things on to charity shops as a space-saving measure but there are so many books I wish I'd kept. Which is probably why I don't ever get rid of any books at all now!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's a vicious cycle! The good thing for me at least is that so many of the ones I want to replace can easily be found at charity shops or used bookstores -- and an excuse to buy books can't be a truly bad thing :)

      Delete
  8. Typically, when I get rid of books, I go in with the mind set of 'love 'em and leave 'em' (although truth be told I didn't love them all). There is one exception to this rule for me though, The Noughts and Crosses series by Malorie Blackman. When I was younger I had a much smaller space in which to keep by books and so things were regularly rotated and donated - that series being one of them because, as like you mentioned, I felt I had outgrown them, in this case, the YA genre. Now, five plus years on, I've so not outgrown YA! I want that collection back on my bookshelves so badly! I will be purchasing it some time in the future, that's for sure, as I really want to reread it.

    :-)
    Bits & Bobs

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I've been hearing a lot about Naughts and Crosses lately -- I'll have to check those books out!

      I'm much the same way -- I was so eager to get on to bigger, better, "grown-up" books that I never thought I would still be be enjoying those same books today. And I definitely wasn't thinking far enough ahead to think I might have wanted to save some for my future kids one day :( I do love an excuse to buy books though and am lucky enough to be able to replace my collection a bit at a time now.

      Delete
  9. Such a sad post. I too have gotten rid of (not thrown away of course) some books that I regret. Some I read for school that I re-sold back to the bookstore even though I liked them, but when you don't have a lot of space for books and you are a poor college student you don't really give the action a second thought. I have a couple of boxes of books at my parents house that I haven't been through in forever and I wonder what ones I kept. (Until I get a house I have no room for them.) I will have to go through them next time I'm visiting my parents, because lately I have been wanting to re-read Little House on The Prairie, and well I wonder what books I saved for my kids.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Selling back college books was pretty much an automatic decision for me too! I hope you get a chance to look through those boxes at your parents' house -- I bet there are all kinds of childhood gems waiting for you :) The BEST part of buying a house was definitely finally getting BIG bookcases :)

      Delete
  10. I absolutely regret some of the books from my childhood and teens that I either lost or got rid of -- some I've re-added to my shelves more recently via used bookstores, but some are just gone forever, sadly. (I was horrified after my junior year abroad, when my father had moved during the year I was away and gave away boxes and boxes of books from our family room shelves without checking with me first! I may still be holding that grudge...) One of the nice things about becoming a parent (that didn't occur to me ahead of time) is the chance to re-create my childhood library by collecting books that I know I want to share with my own kids. That's actually how a lot of my old favorites have come back into my life. But it's taken until I got far enough in my life to have a home and feel settled to feel like I could really start accumulating books again. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's the best part about used bookstores! The books I am missing seem to be easily found again. I would have been so upset if my books were given away without even being told about it :( I don't even have kids yet, but am enjoying recreating my childhood bookshelves. I've found that the C.S. Lewis quote “A children's story that can only be enjoyed by children is not a good children's story in the slightest” rings true for me a lot lately :)

      Delete
  11. My mom and dad sold all of my books at a yard sale when i was away..so now I hoard them. It was awful. I had complete sets, gah..horrible memories.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's awful! At least it was my own choice to get rid of these books -- I would have been very upset if they were swiped out from under me without any warning :(

      Delete
  12. I had a TON of goosebumps books which totally started out my love of horror novels and I have no clue where they went. I swear I didn't get rid of them but I had to of and that makes me so sad! I'm going through a re-reading phase and I'd love to re-read those too.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Not knowing where they went sounds even worse than knowing you gave books away and wishing you hadn't! My brother had practically a whole bookcase filled with Goosebumps books, but then went through a very long phase where he didn't read much at all except (maybe) for school work. Unlike his sister, I'm sure he doesn't regret passing on those books from his childhood!

      Delete
  13. I DID THIS TOO! I never want to hoard books, and I still regularly clean stuff off my shelves BUT oh man, I regret getting rid of some of the books I read as a child/teen. I've replaced some over the years and did hold on to some of the most special ones (like the first set of Anne of Green Gables books I ever got), but I sometimes think about all the books I *used* to own and get kind of sad. Why did we purge so many?! :(

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I guess purging is a necessary evil -- it's really hard to tell what we will want to revisit in a decade or more, unfortunately :/ The one plus is that a lot of cover redesigns or special editions of classics are awesome and I now have an excuse to buy them! I do wish I had more than 3 from back in the day though...

      Delete
  14. Fortunately, I saved many of my children's/middle grade books (and now I get to share them with my niece!!), but I got rid of a lot of my series like Sweet Valley High and The Babysitter's Club and Love Stories. I really wish I had kept them for nostalgia's sake, but then you have to store them...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yea, storage is an issue, especially for those kinds of prolific series, but I guess I just wish I kept at least a few of each -- I was ruthless in my purging back then! That's so great you have books to share with your niece though -- you would totally be my favorite aunt!

      Delete

I'd love to hear what you think :)